HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP … with yourself?

Hello and happy September time! :)

 How have you been lovely? Chatting about something far too often neglected … how your relationship is … na not with who you’re with or your family or even friends - with one of the most fundamentally important important relationships-YOU. 

 Let’s cut to the jugular - what are the signs you have an unhealthy relationship with yourself … quite simply put probably an internally loud self-critical voice, feeling tired as your most common place emotion, tendency to over-criticize or judge others, time management all over the place & let’s not forget agreeing to fulfill expectations even when we know it’s really a ‘no’ from me. 

 Seriously though , the whole feeling tired yet feeling like you need to look after everyone & everything before you - who’s with me on that one ?! 

 Now we know some of the signs, what can we do about them ? Why is it even important to know ourselves ? 

 Okay so first (& I know if you’ve been reading for a while you know this is somewhat of a catch phrase from me by now …) - THERAPY! It isn’t only reserved for people who’ve gone through obvious trauma ,it’s for EVERYONE ,it gives you an emotionally non-bias outlet to really explore , understand & unpack the layers of yourself better - as a catalyst for real change . Something that’s also an important consideration is to review your ENVIRONMENT- who you spend your time around & most importantly WHY. You can’t expect a healthy relationship with you if you’re surrounded by those who don’t & only enable the distracting behaviour therefore distancing yourself from how to better switch around yours. (Distraction comes in many forms - it can look like drinking excessively ,drugs ,sleeping around ,even smoking - it’s all personalised & if you really ask yourself about the WHY behind the action, that’s when you can start getting REAL with you).

Taking stock of environment means you start getting MINDFUL- once you start noticing what you do & why , being able to process this by journaling is also a great way to tune into your inner being through thoughts and feelings. The overall goal of having a better relationship with you should be a more compassionate, loving view of self.& a feeling of increased self awareness (an interesting topic for another day).

If we talk about this from a personal perspective , it was when I had the worst relationship with myself ,that the most damaging relationships with other people could develop in my life . If you don’t take away anything else , please remember that how you feel in the relationship with yourself mirrors in the quality of your external relationships. Once you start relating better to your TRUE self ,that’s when you start tapping into a whole world of potential ,positivity, genuineness, individualism & HEALING. 

 (Again, therapy is one of the biggest swear-bys personally to get to the healthier self-relationship that then increases the quality ,standard and safety of relationships in your atmosphere!)

   Hopefully you’ve taken away some key insights into knowing yourself to a better level ,why this is important & how to get there ! 

 As always ,I will continue to share my learns on this topic on socials (connect here) & send you into this new month with all the love & light - until next time ,

  With love , 

Abs Xo
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  COMING SOON : Your Autumn Self-Care Guide
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