2022 is here ❣️

I won’t say the classic ‘happy new year’ since I know a lot of your Christmas seasons (mine included after having to isolate & family being split - oh & almost getting stuck on a remote Scottish island 😹!) looked very different for perhaps another year running. However it’s my most serious hope that this entry brings you the uplift & difference of perception to life your mind & soul for a little. 💞

  This time last year saw the release of the blog entry talking about how New Years resolutions are something I don’t believe in - as I wrote this sitting in my dressing gown ,(potentially scary -looking 😹) face mask while sipping on tea , there was a different theme in my mind & on my heart..
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  The start of the year always holds this air of pressure - pressure to be better ,do more ,make bigger plans ,make more money , dream bigger ,be more organised, look better.. you get the picture ! So let’s challenge that . Instead of external pressure, pressure, pressure, let’s try COMPASSION, CONNECTION & GRACE🙌🏼.Two of my fave humans & influential speakers on these topics are Mel Robbins & Brene Brown , who equally share their passion coupled with real research into it. What is the overall theme of these power words & principles though ? It’s GENUINENESS❣️

  In the spirit of practicing a greater degree of authenticity , I have to admit I’ve changed the topic & consequentially the title of this post almost 10 times before realising that’s exactly what holds most of us back from showing beautiful raw parts of ourselves. Trying so hard to portray images of selves & push to meet unrealistic standards that aren’t personally our own❣️

  Short & sweetly put - this year (& any length of time for that matter- is the right time to be more of ‘you’ by showing your unedited imperfectly beautiful self : self-compassion, putting energy into real connection & giving yourself the gift of grace when plans change & things may look different than you expected. When you start feeling that invisible society ‘pressure’ start trying to speak in your ear this season , CHANGE the conversation & reach out to the support people who love you for who you REALLY are❣️
 Personally, that’s what I’m stepping into this season with the view of doing liberally !

    Love& light always ,

              Abs Xo




NEXT SEASON : ‘What your inner child has to tell you ‘

AUTUMN IS FINALLY HERE !
 Okay, if you can't already tell by the shouty capitals ,this is actually one of my fave seasons (it's a clear tie between spring!)- not only because of the beautiful fall colours ,but also the beautiful metaphor for change it represents. There's something poetic in the way the transitional change is done so elegantly ,only to come back full force in the spring refreshed !

 Bringing me onto my hope for you with this blog post- that you may read it & leave feeling inspired for a new perspective as it gets a little colder (for all my Scottish people for sure anyway !). Let's break it down into too parts, since any self-care is both INTERNAL & EXTERNAL , starting with the internal.

 As the weather gets that little bit colder & the daylight hours dwindle, it's important now more than ever to check-in with how you're feeling. That can even mean sometimes taking an entire mental-health day or self-care day - something collectively the world needs to work on eradicating shame around doing! During a recent training for my therapy course, there was a discussion around how we distract ourselves from actually checking in with ourselves by always checking in with others first..are you prone to doing this? Definitely personally aware this is a work-in-progress for myself ! You as a 'being' deserve your kindness, love, energy & affection included in one of your most valuable relationships. There are little rituals you can start practicing to help with nurturing your internal self-care , such as spending time with just you for maybe 15 mins to start with first thing in the morning where either journaling any thoughts & feelings that come up or reconnecting with yourself on a nature walk / drinking your fave hot drink can be really cathartic. Hands down one of my fave journals ever has to be this guided '5 minute journal' which I've tried & tested many a time!!! If you are someone who is finding consistently low moods or self-destructive patterns a theme ,or even if you're just curious about learning more about yourself /increasing self-awareness- I cannot recommend therapy enough too! ( see my earlier blog entry here on different types of therapy!).

  On the note of internal monitoring ,how are you feeling after spending time with your friends right now ? How about after you’ve been on your phone ? Re-evaluating my influences & also what I expose myself to is something I do every season to ‘refresh’ my mental/emotional wellness. That can mean adjusting who you consider your 'tribe' in friendships /editing what accounts you choose to follow online. Some of the most empowering online spaces for me right now are accounts such as ‘Women of Impact’ & also stocking up on strong audible titles such as any of ‘Brene Brown’s’ books (a strong fave has to be ‘the Gift of Imperfection’). Remember, when choosing something that truly speaks to you - firstly think about what you’re going through right now & make your decision in relation to someone who’s written /created around helping with that topic ❣️

   Moving onto the external ...fall is most popularly known for 2 things : spice & JUMPERS! So it would only be fitting that i include some of my fave sustainable jumper brands for you to keep cosy as well as scented home ideas! Even if you don't fancy forking out for 100% sustainable clothing, another great way to be more planet-friendly is buying new-condition, second hand on either depop or vinted apps. My top 3 sustainable brands right now are TALA , Neu Apparel & NA-KD .

 Is it REALLY autumn if it doesn’t include mentioning pumpkin spice everything ?! 😉 Joking aside ,spices that will really aid your body especially in the changing weather is any natural mixed spice - I’m using ginger for when I feel sick or when it’s my time of month , as it’s a natural anti-sickness remedy. It’s tempting to try every autumn seasonal drink all the coffee shops start offering ,however ask for less pumps of their syrup /try their sugar-free versions & your body & mood will thank you for it while you still get the autumnL treat! ...While wearing your cosy jumpers of course 😏!

  I’m a huge fan of scented candles right now - vanilla is pretty much an all season staple right ?! (A recently discovered organic candle brand JI'm adoring this season is "Sand and Fog"!). Filling your home with warm ,relaxing scents (yes, even the pumpkin spice is worth a try;) ) will help encourage you to switch off more easily ! However don’t forget to try exploring the outside colours of your go-to walks to snap some naturally pretty pics !

  J & I are actually using every new season to touch up something new in the flat -this season we’re creating a warmer more relaxed atmosphere with a ‘cappuccino foam’ paint in the hallway & spare room (a.k.a ‘the Abi sanctuary’ aha!) - don’t worry I’ll keep you posted on progress! Taking stock of what’s around you & what no longer brings you joy or peace means it’s okay to let go of some of our physical belongings too - promise spending more attention on your spaces/ environments will boost your self-care levels so much higher❣️

  As always I aim to offer a safe supportive space in all of the online communities I’m part of , meaning I’d love to hear from you about how you are or what fall adventures you’ve been having too :) (see below to connect more!)


     With love ,light & all the higher self-care,


  Abs Xo

 
Coming soon... 'Value-mapping' for making life decisions clearer!
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Hello and happy September time! :)

 How have you been lovely? Chatting about something far too often neglected … how your relationship is … na not with who you’re with or your family or even friends - with one of the most fundamentally important important relationships-YOU. 

 Let’s cut to the jugular - what are the signs you have an unhealthy relationship with yourself … quite simply put probably an internally loud self-critical voice, feeling tired as your most common place emotion, tendency to over-criticize or judge others, time management all over the place & let’s not forget agreeing to fulfill expectations even when we know it’s really a ‘no’ from me. 

 Seriously though , the whole feeling tired yet feeling like you need to look after everyone & everything before you - who’s with me on that one ?! 

 Now we know some of the signs, what can we do about them ? Why is it even important to know ourselves ? 

 Okay so first (& I know if you’ve been reading for a while you know this is somewhat of a catch phrase from me by now …) - THERAPY! It isn’t only reserved for people who’ve gone through obvious trauma ,it’s for EVERYONE ,it gives you an emotionally non-bias outlet to really explore , understand & unpack the layers of yourself better - as a catalyst for real change . Something that’s also an important consideration is to review your ENVIRONMENT- who you spend your time around & most importantly WHY. You can’t expect a healthy relationship with you if you’re surrounded by those who don’t & only enable the distracting behaviour therefore distancing yourself from how to better switch around yours. (Distraction comes in many forms - it can look like drinking excessively ,drugs ,sleeping around ,even smoking - it’s all personalised & if you really ask yourself about the WHY behind the action, that’s when you can start getting REAL with you).

Taking stock of environment means you start getting MINDFUL- once you start noticing what you do & why , being able to process this by journaling is also a great way to tune into your inner being through thoughts and feelings. The overall goal of having a better relationship with you should be a more compassionate, loving view of self.& a feeling of increased self awareness (an interesting topic for another day).

If we talk about this from a personal perspective , it was when I had the worst relationship with myself ,that the most damaging relationships with other people could develop in my life . If you don’t take away anything else , please remember that how you feel in the relationship with yourself mirrors in the quality of your external relationships. Once you start relating better to your TRUE self ,that’s when you start tapping into a whole world of potential ,positivity, genuineness, individualism & HEALING. 

 (Again, therapy is one of the biggest swear-bys personally to get to the healthier self-relationship that then increases the quality ,standard and safety of relationships in your atmosphere!)

   Hopefully you’ve taken away some key insights into knowing yourself to a better level ,why this is important & how to get there ! 

 As always ,I will continue to share my learns on this topic on socials (connect here) & send you into this new month with all the love & light - until next time ,

  With love , 

Abs Xo
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  COMING SOON : Your Autumn Self-Care Guide
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Happy summer friend ! 😊

How are you feeling ? Personally with more people out & about with work commitments on the side of studying while honoring passions -it can be a lot ! However , not impossible😊.   Looking after yourself simultaneously while keeping your daily routines is SO important, especially in the current season.

  Bringing us into the topic of this entry - being a Highly Sensitive Person (a.k.a HSP) ,what it means & the power plus responsibility of that.  'HSP' officially in the psychology world is defined as ‘a term for those who are thought to have an increased or deeper central nervous system sensitivity to physical, emotional, or social stimuli (also occasionally referred to as having sensory processing sensitivity, or SPS)’ ; terms that were first created in this way by psychologists Elaine Aron &Arthur Aron in the mid-1990s. Strengths& also challenges are both traits HSP’s work through such as loud noises, horror movies or upsetting news being experienced really powerfully.    HSP’s also are often misunderstood...

  Why does this happen ? Either because you aren’t in a supportive environment where you feel ‘held’ with your emotions and/or yourself /the other person/people in the environment don’t understand that HSP’s have serious strengths in their abilities. Phrases that will help you realise the environment won’t be helpful for you include being told you are ‘being unreasonable’, ‘over-sensitive’, ’too much’ etc. Definitely red flags and signs this company is not your tribe. Be wary of taking these negative words on as your internal truth -it is not true and let me tell you why through facts about the strengths in HSP’s.  I have to be honest with you, this is SO close to my heart as an HSP myself, for literally YEARS I was told and took on the belief (of people not in my tribe may I add!) that this was actually a weakness rather than a strength. The real STRENGTHS in HSP’s are the acute natural ability to feel others emotions around them, pick up tiny switches in even the tiniest verbal & non-verbal communication cues from others, high creativity levels & being highly in-touch with their personal emotional responses. This is literally a superpower meaning you tend to experience reality differently being an HSP from perhaps the other strong personality traits that exist. (I’d also like to point out being an HSP is literally that , a PERSONALITY TRAIT, not a diagnosis).         

  What can you do as an HSP to stay safe since over-stimuli can lead to regular overwhelm ? BOUNDARIES ! Learning how to set up empathetic boundaries means you will keep your emotional and mental energy intact so you can recharge between being in groups of company ,for example. Making time to recharge ,whatever that looks like for you in a healthy way, will help to keep your balance while also keeping a way to write down & therefore process /let go of feelings & thoughts that try to stay with you that aren’t yours. Being an HSP is a beautiful thing 😊 ,when you know what works for you to keep the self love & care as priority too ! Personally, therapy has really helped me tap into learning & practicing personal emotional & mental boundaries so my HSP brain doesn’t go into override 100% of the time (highly recommend therapy for everyone ,no matter who you are !)

   Whether you're an HSP yourself, know one or just want to be able to better support others who are, being understanding and open to conversations with those who experience it is helpful for better developing as more empathic people:).

   Until next time, stay safe, healthy ,happy & sending you love & light,

   Abs Xo


NEXT MONTH : Do you have a healthy relationship...with you?
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Hello friends & happy start of summer ☀️!

 How are you? This time of change (if you’re in the UK it’s the opening back up of everything too!) can be both beautiful & challenging so I hope you’re taking real care 😌.

 This month it’s really been on my heart to talk about what 'body positivity'-the wellness buzzword-really is & how we can stay in a positive place with it - which is sometimes easier said than done!

 If you’ve been following for a while you’ll know that mental health & body positivity advocacy are hugely personally important due to key life experiences I’ve had - when we open up the conversation,we also let people know that it’s okay not to be okay with these 💪🏼.

 Let’s start with what google defines body positivity by :’ social movement focused on empowering individuals no matter what their physical weight or size ,whilst challenging ways in which society views & presents the physical body’
 Simply put ,body positivity is having an unconditional love for your body ,no matter what it’s appearance & having a no-judgement view on how others choose to express there’s .
 
  Which is all very well, but how do you actually ACHIEVE this ? I’m not saying you’ll never have insecure day when you start shifting your mindset to being body positive, however there’s certain steps you can take to switch back to loving the skin you’re in again faster 😊. For a first step ,taking stock of your current beliefs about your body & why is a good solid place to start to rewiring it as positive. If it’s a deep origin from you past (mine definitely was with eating disorder and abuse from the past) ,then a therapy is a safe & effective way to explore this, you guys know how much I’m an advocate for therapy for everyone ! A lot of the time our thought patterns & beliefs are found from unconscious places where they’ve been there for years,where what you look at for role models is a HUGE part of influencing this. That being said another key stage is to look at the accounts you’r following online & what message it supports.If you’re finding it challenging to accept the way your body looks, yet the majority of accounts are people whose images only make you compare negatively , then it’s time to hit the unfollow button! Here’s some of my fave body positive accounts to follow right now for you to be inspired by too :
-Elise Joan 

-Nelly London 

-Danae Mercer 

-Blogilates 

Once you’ve got your influences in order (& this is something worth reviewing every so often!) , discovering what makes YOU feel empowered & beautiful just the way you are will boost your confidence 😊. For me ,it’s putting on my fave colour in an outfit that makes me feel amazing , moving my body in a way I can appreciate my strength, finding freedom on horseback & being around those I know who love me no matter what ! Maybe for you it’s chatting to a trusted friend when you’re have a challenging body-love day, taking beautiful pics of yourself just for you, or writing body positive affirmations on your mirror to see everyday of what you truly love & appreciate about your body !  The main takeaway in the journey of body positivity is to openly let yourself love, explore & appreciate all that your body is, can do & how it looks right now in this moment because I promise you it is gorgeous & unique in it’s own right !  

  Until next time ,sending you all the body-love & light,    

​ Abi xo

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NEXT MONTH : Hyper Sensitive People - challenging perceptions!
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Hello friends, it's been a while ! 

Lots of life changes are happening worldwide this month & my personal life is no exception with a new job, new website re-branding(work in progress!!) ,new course kick-starting the next phase of my therapy-training & of course making time for those I love ,horses ,personal therapy and making content to uplift & inform you! :) 

Hoping this post finds you well ,resting & as I sit listening to the birds singing away in a therapeutic way,it’s so obvious that spring has its own therapeutic themes - processing change into another new beautiful life season❣️
Bringing me into the topic of this entry- everything experiencing therapy has equipped me with to tell you too😃.

Now I’m a HUGE advocate for the right therapy for any individual. I say ‘right’ here because there are varied types so each therapist will bring a different ‘style’ into the space - also taking into consideration the individual personality of each therapist. I like to explain it like a driving instructor of life where if you don’t ‘click’ with them , you won’t be able to trust them enough to truly open up & learn how to navigate .Sometimes it takes a few sessions with a therapist to know this, however switching therapists until you find your fit is so important if you don’t feel you can truly open up , after all , their only wish for you in the space is to help you & if it’s not them usually they will refer you if you haven’t found someone otherwise but they will never feel personally offended if you decide to move on😌🙌🏼.

A rather recent epiphany of mine that you may also relate to has been realising there’s always hidden reasons why you’re REALLY at therapy & there’s also different LAYERS to the process ; let’s break this up in two parts :
Firstly the reason you think you’re going into therapy is actually only 1 part of it (surface level in your conscious awareness) chances are ,you need professional guidance gathering parts of your subconscious internal environment (or you probably wouldn’t be considering it in the first place!) so don’t be surprised if you uncover within surfacing unexpected new discoveries (this can be exciting !)
Secondly different layers exist within the context of self-discovery & exploration (which will look different for each person). I used to stop getting therapy when it wasn't 'suiting' anymore honestly ;such as a new job or deciding MYSELF that I was done - basically when you think you've reached a peak of discovery ,there is actually a whole NEW level you discover, so when you think you've reached a potential closure-point ,actually discussing this through with your therapist will be so valuable as a good assessment point too!
It is also really useful to note that the different types or 'approaches' to therapy ,hold different typical characteristics. Here’s a brief overview of 3 of the main types of therapy to give you some context :
- Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (a.k.a CBT) focuses on your unhelpful thoughts, habits & behaviour, identifying them ,then replacing them with better ones that help rather than harm & is action-focused. It usually tends to have a set time frame of treatment which is discussed with your therapist ,where there's also heavy value in working as a team & you'll often have homework exercises too. Linked with treating :
    •    mood disorders, such as depression and bipolar disorder
    •    anxiety and phobias
    •    eating disorders
    •    substance use disorders
    •    OCD
    •    insomnia
    •    some symptoms of schizophrenia

- Person-Centred (or Humanistic) therapy looks at the inner self , the true self & the perceived self ,also with exploration of how the person experiences the world ( known as phenomenology) . The person is seen as ‘the expert in themselves’ & so therapists facilitate this by taking lead of the client while checking-in where necessary/appropriate & helping to identify key thoughts, emotions& belief systems. Associated in helping with:    
    •    self-esteem issues
    •    difficulty coping with chronic health concerns
    •    effects of trauma
    •    depression
    •    relationship issues
    •    substance use disorder
    •    feelings of worthlessness or being lost in life
- Psychodynamic (or Psychoanalytic) approaches tend to be longer-term ,looking heavily into childhood development & trauma , anything that disrupts this development and how it impacts relationships, thoughts &emotions in the present. The therapist works with you to explore the connection between your unconscious mind and your actions by looking at these with any patterns - associated with treating :    
     •    depression
    •    anxiety
    •    eating disorders
    •    somatic symptoms
    •    substance use disorder
    •    a variety of other conditions
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There is also a fourth type called integrative therapy (my personal fave!) which is a mix of all the styles of therapy ,applied & adapted depending on who the person is & what they bring into the space !
(If you want to read up on the different styles a little more in-depth ,read a simple explanation here) 

To summarise ,it doesn't matter what you do, how old you are, where you are in the world or what you've been /are going through - there is a therapy & therapist out there that can benefit you ! 

Had an experience with therapy already ? Or maybe you're still considering it ? I'd love to hear your shared thoughts below !:) 

Until next time,take care & keeping growing :)!


        Love & light always,


    Abi Xo



NEXT MONTH : What body positivity REALLY means :)
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​March is here 😃❣️Meaning Spring is ever approaching & so is the sunshine thank the Lord!☀️

One of the most challenging parts of seasonal change is the effect it has on our body’s routine with daylight hours changing- what better topic then to cover with evening routines - now everyone loves to sleep, yet the popular lifestyle especially portrayed on social media of sometimes glamorizing over-working plus the everyday pressures can make it really hard to switch off & get some decent sleep !

This is something I consider a work in progress with myself too so I’ve been reflecting on what helps vs. what hinders from research & also experiences I've had personally hoping you’ll relate &/ or take adaptations from anything you want to try too😊

Good sleep can only happen with the right PREPARATION ❣️That’s why your evening routine being on point is literally so important for your rest quality. Here are top tips I’ve learnt to be really useful:


- HYDRATE! The more water you consume not only will it keep your skin hydrated but it prevents you waking up feeling dehydrated with a headache first thing in the morning 😃.

- READING! Swap the screens for a fave book at least one hour before bed (I’m reading Sharon Jayne’s ‘5 dreams of every woman’ 😃)

- CREATE YOUR SPACE! Make where you’re actually sleeping somewhere you look forward to coming back to whether that be dressing your bed in your fave sheet set or making sure your room is the ideal temp.!

- SEE SLEEP AS A GOOD THING ! A lot of the reasons sometimes we fight sleep may come from the way we were told as kids we had to be in bed by a certain time, so unconsciously we go against this by displaying our adult independence in delaying sleep . As soon as you start switching how you think & feel about sleep - instead making it something you look forward to that’s rewarding for your body & mind , this changes the narrative😃

- AROMATHERAPY! There’s countless scientific studies on the calming benefits of certain scents, mine for sleep definitely has to be lavender 😌!

The benefits of a good nights sleep itself are too many of bane ,however for all my fit family people out there , it is absolutely essential for muscle repair & the hormones needing for their building too .

Any routines can be subject to adaptation based on what your current commitments & changing schedule may be - when you have the basic principles down that work for you though , keeping your rest as a priority is a lot easier 😃.

If you have any pro tips for sleep or evening routines that are working for you right now ,I’d love to hear either in the comments here or by connecting with me on social media.:)

Until next time we chat, here’s to continuing to learn new ways to better our wellness as we move into a new season 😃

      Love & light always,

      Abs  Xo



NEXT MONTH : Chatting everything Therapy :)
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Happy February ! :D

Firstly, if you're reading this snowed in like me right now - I feel you ! This is the most snow I can actually remember  experiencing so far in adulthood ?! Can't say I don't love playing with it like a kid- we need to honor our inner child's playfulness sometimes:).
 
J & I have been really tweaking our morning & evening routines at the moment since we're now staying with each other again. It's so interesting how your company can affect your habits & what you do when ! 

That being the inspiration for examining this topic - let's dive straight  in with one of those topics we've all had either positive or negative experience with - MORNING ROUTINES ! I want to start by saying  even though I am a morning person now, I definitely had to work on it & sometimes you need to listen to your body if getting up earlier means compromising your health in some way (again, I'm not a doctor!) ...however 9/10 times , sticking to a morning routine will 100% positively impact your day ! Why ? Well ,to name a few : better productivity, time for breakfast, less overwhelm ,having 'me time' before your daily routine/ commitments kick-in, time to decide what the priorities are that day & how you're going to make it happen, better sleep quality at night ...

The even better news is, it can actually be something you LOOK FORWARD to doing ! 

Ever had that narrative in your head telling you something like 'I'm not a morning person', 'exercise isn't for me' etc etc. then back it up with an excuse ?! Yeah I'm here to tell you that your inner thoughts & words to yourself are POWERFUL & if you tell yourself you can't do something - you're the only one who can change that narrative to  'actually, I can !'! 

Once you make the decision to go for it for YOU & your overall wellness ,thats the first step to making real change ! 

I want to share the top 5 aspects I switched to making morning routines actually fun (feel free to use as inspo !):

1 - Set out /have an idea of exactly what outfit I'm wearing to workout in the next morning (choose clothes with your fave mood-boosting colour or fit !)

2 - Choose a workout I actually ENJOY doing ! (if you need help finding your perfect match, go to the 'connect section of this website or fill in the form below!) 

3 - Make the bed FIRST THING when you wake up - this ensures you've accomplished something positive before you've even left the room !

4 - Change your alarm sound to your FAVE song & get up on your FIRST alarm (yes, we're all guilty of not doing this all the time, however it really helps practice that self-discipline!)

5 -  Have a healthy ,yummy & balanced breakfast that's pre-planned you love to eat & can't wait to eat !!!

There you have it ! My stripped-down top tips for the aspects I shifted to making mornings fun again - no matter how busy the day ahead ,keeping this time sacred to you will make you realise you also matter & so does looking after you ! (We'll be exploring how this ties into evening routines in the next entry too :D)

 As always, I'm curious to know what your top morning tips are too so feel free to share on any of my social media accounts or simply by commenting below :).

 Take care & we'll chat again next month ! :D

Love & light always,

​    Abs Xo


NEXT MONTH : Elevating Evening Routines  
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 First entry of a brand new year! Hello & welcome if you're new here !😃

Who else can feel the adventures & possibility just calling to them ?! 😌
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  I have to admit though, there can be a certain pressure placed upon you unless you’re being super mindful of your social media this time of year - the ‘New Year Resolutions’ announced literally everywhere , only to seemingly dissipate come the following month ...

  This is why the buzz term ‘resolutions’ is actually something I don’t do anymore - the meaning has been diluted and often lost in its overuse ! Having said that ,what I really do believe in is GOAL SETTING ❣️

So let’s talk about how to make REAL CHANGES for the year ahead successfully shall we 😉

 The key principles of making real change in your life is getting raw ,honest & consistent with your commitment to yourself .

  First off you need to determine WHY you want to reach certain places in certain aspects of your life& be honest about how strong these reasons are (if they lack concrete reason ,it’s easy to stop working towards them !) . For example, if you say that reading more is something you want to achieve in 2021 , go into the deeper reasons why that is - maybe it’s to study for a course you’re doing , to develop your personal perspectives in a specific area or as part of a better evening routine ! The reason itself for your ‘why’ doesn’t have to seem strong to anyone else but  if it’s concrete forYOU ,this will help you push forward even when you don’t necessarily feel like it !

  Determining your whys for your goals is super important - now that you have them a proven way to help keep them at the forefront of your mind is VISION BOARDING (I’ve linked one of my favourite guided resources for what this is here 😃) ,where you have a visual reminder & representation put somewhere you’ll see it every single day !

  The two last proven things you can use ( that I use myself !😃) is COMMUNITY & PLANNING❣️ When you have people (most likely virtually at the moment 😉) who support ,uplift & have your best interests at heart /similar goals to your own , it will keep you accountable, inspired & supported ! (If you’re reading this& your goals are health & fitness related ,feel free to join my fit family online below - love to have you there😌 !)

  Planning your goals makes them manageable & more real to you as you have set tasks you can action ,based around current commitments . One of the best ways I’ve found to do this is the following :

1. Recognising yearly ‘big goals’
2. Breaking down these in 12 smaller monthly goals
3. Creating weekly goals based off the bigger monthly ones
4. Working out how much time a day & for how many days per week you will be putting smaller every day tasks into action to complete your weekly goal 💪🏼

  That’s it ! My breakdown of how to really understand why your goals exist for you & how to really make them happen !😃

  This can sometimes seem challenging if you’ve never done it before so as always ,my inbox is always open for you & I’d love to hear from & help in any way I can :)!

  Wishing you the most grounded ,positive & clarifying January’s so far 😃.


     Love & light always,


   Abs Xo



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NEXT MONTH : Morning Routines - Keeping the Fun ! 
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Hello friend ! December is here🎄!

The time of family, friends and FOOD - fitting on this months topic! ‘Mindful’ gets thrown around a LOT on social media in the wellness sphere...but what does it really mean when it comes to mindful eating? Why is it even a good thing realistically?  

I wanted to make this months focus on something that will hopefully help you start to understand what the difference between healthy & unhealthy mindsets around food actually are through my personal experiences & how you can put simple practices into place I’ve used that have affected me really positively 😀! 

Firstly, to get some context let’s dive into what my personal food mindset development started like. If you’ve been on my journey with me , you’ll hear me reference this on my Instagram ‘mental health journey’ videos briefly - my beginnings with food were not a happy one. Long story short I slowly started developing mindsets that were damaging around what I ate - it started me giving absolutely no thought to the food I put into my body, then got to the point I genuinely feared eating properly (enter eating disorder) . If you are reading this & struggling currently ,I hear you, I see you &my inbox is always open - I also cannot recommend therapy enough for this (make sure you feel it’s the right fit for you though, therapists are essentially your life aspect ‘driving instructors’ so you need to be able to trust & open up to them 😊!) ,which is an integral part of what helped me overcome this overall . In my head I viewed any food with ANY sort of fat content (yes, even the good fats because at this point I didn’t know these existed!) as literal poison. Nothing felt ‘safe enough’ to eat because I was terrified of gaining weight from what I was putting into my body so simply put, I stopped eating apart from apples & plain salad... 

Now, we could dive into all of the subconscious beliefs years of reading ‘VOGUE’ where women & body image was displayed a certain way played a part in this ,however I want to focus on the concrete takeaways from this period in my life. I have ZERO clue about the importance of eating balanced food groups. I had zero energy. Zero patience. The only factor that made me totally reconsider loving food instead of hating it out of total confusion & sadness was the horse Cheerio munching an apple loudly & with pure joy (we used to share one) - if he could love his food so much ,why couldn’t I ?!    

What followed was realising enough was enough,  education & amazing therapy. I poured over online article after online article on why each food group was essential , I looked into intermittent fasting, pros & cons of different lifestyles with their way of eating & the different opinions of top nutritionists. The key FALSE mindset I had originally about food being directly linked to staying 'overweight' or 'skinny' was slowly beginning to shift. How your body reacted to certain foods was down to so many factors :lifestyle, genetics, any physiological issues & MINDSET.   

I worked for years & years on figuring out what ‘healthy’ looked like for me and I am proud to say now that even though therapy is an ongoing theme for me in my life (I honestly recommend the benefits beyond words) ,I have learned to TEAM up with my nutrition as fuel to carry my mind and body strength into feeling GOOD everyday.

A good friend reminded me recently that new habits take 60 days to turn into a natural element of your everyday routine - this was literally how I transformed my food mindset into being a healthy mindful one. That is the literal difference between healthy & unhealthy food mindset -knowing what hurts your body compared to what HELPS your body. Little by little, I used everyday efforts with the view to SERVE my body. The key changes I made are as follows so you can try them for yourself too :

-I started everyday with a workout & balanced breakfast of something I LOOKED FORWARD to eating but that was also good for me ! (used to be overnight oat recipes as I could prep these the night before ,then I started making frozen fruit superfood smoothies with plant based milk usually chocolate flavour😍)

-My meals were tasty, balanced & thought out in advance (if I was going out for a meal somewhere ,I looked up their menu on the website & took 5 mins to decide the healthiest yummiest option so I didn’t order last minute out of stress : mindful=thoughtfulness!)

-Started listening to my body’s reaction to certain  foods & adjusted accordingly - I’m now gluten free because gluten bloats me

-Gave myself grace when I had an off day 😃

-Told close friends & family that I was making a change to eat more mindfully for my health (even though this took a while, they began to be really supportive & make it easy for me to make good choices)

-I used my fave healthy foods as snacks in between meals & main meals portioned so I ate veggies as the biggest portion & co flex carbs were the smallest size on my plate 😊

-Found healthy tasty alternatives to my fave desserts (yes..I have a huge sweet tooth!)

-Increased my water intake to the recommended daily amount (this not only improves your skin, energy & fullness but also reduces sugar cravings!)      

Be warned of trend ‘diets’ out there that tell you there’s a quick fix - not only will it permanently damage your internal body’s ecosystem but it isn’t true because real lasting positive change takes time, thought & care - this is the true meaning of mindful nutrition to me.

This festive season especially means lots of food & fun ! I wish you all the best memories & mindful choices for your body & mind 😃.                          

If nothing else sticks with your from this entry I want to leave you with this thought - it is never too late to make positive change in your life for your health, in whatever capacity that is ! YOU are WORTHY of health, happiness & light in your life❣️

Love & light always,

     Abs  Xo 



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NEXT MONTH : Goodbye 'NYE Resolutions'
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Join my online fit studio for December here !